I have to come clean on something.

A secret that’s been haunting me all my adult life.

As an interior designer you’d expect my house to be presentable and organized, right?

Hmm yes.

 

Well, here’s the truth.

I cheated.

Sure, on the surface my house seemed reasonably OK.

But boy, do not dare to open a cupboard, or the refrigerator. And definitely do NOT even think of going into my closet. If there is a door and it’s closed, my friend – it’s so for a reason!

DO NOT OPEN IT!

I’m a habitual closet stuffer.

I love things. And because I liked to hang onto them, I’ve mastered the art of puzzle-packing

– the lifelong habit of shamelessly packing super tight every square inch of a given space.

And where it failed, I simply shoved things tighter.

And there it would stay in the dark, squashed up and untouched forever.

Slowly turning into a quiet CLOSET MONSTER.

All my stuff.

 

I didn’t pay much attention to it, and assumed it didn’t pay attention to me either.

But the stuff slyly annexed a part of my brain.

Every time I opened a door it would just sit there, making me feel miserable

• I felt guilty – for not using the stuff, though I fully intended to. One day…
• I felt resentful – for the money I spent, some of these things were expensive!
• I felt like a failure – a lot of these things were symbols of a fantasy lifestyle I dreamt of in my 20’s, but my current reality was completely different.
• I felt stuck – stuff takes up space, and over the years our house size kept increasing with every move. It’s exhausting to maintain, clean, keep up to date.
• And I never felt free  – I dreamt of living light, travel care-free, be able to just pack up and go without much fuss.

All this stuff held me back.

Until one day. A cancer scare, an unlikely book, and a chilly weekend on a desolate beach. It changed my view.

I couldn’t wait to get home to face that monster.

I packed it out. I pondered and I agonized.

And then I set it free.

Gosh, I let go of a lot of things. A LOT. It took some time, I shed some tears, it wasn’t easy. I consulted experts, read books, learnt new skills. I spent hours doing research, and discovered improved ways to sort my stuff. I made endless trips to Goodwill, even had a yard sale (not recommended!).

Slowly with every bag out of the house, the monster shrank.

With every bag I felt a little lighter. I got more clarity, and more energy to chase that lighter lifestyle, to stop living in the past.

It was like a brain re-boot of sorts. A fresh start.

I felt lighter than I ever felt before.

Decluttering gave me freedom.

 

These days I have fewer things, and more space.

Strangely, I get more joy from the things I kept.

And I have less cleaning to do, more time.

Fewer things to worry about, and more energy to focus on the most important things in my life.

I have less stress and more clarity of where I want to go.

I feel light and free.

 

I was surprised to find something else:

With my new-found enthusiasm, and in my work where I get close-up to people’s stuff… that most homes have a hidden closet monster somewhere, even the ones that seem most pristine on the outside.

And that true transformation comes from not only adding pretty new things, but from removing the excess that’s clogging our minds and holding us back.

DESIGN IS NICE

but

DECLUTTERING IS TRANSFORMATIONAL

And that if you attempt the first without the second, you will likely never be completely satisfied.

So these days, when I design a space for a client – first we sit down to edit, then we move on to elevate. The thrill that comes from that is indescribable.

 

 

5  Things that helped me get better at decluttering

1.

DON’T MAKE A BIG DEAL OF IT

Start with something small.

Start with something easy.

Just one corner. One square foot, one drawer, one small surface. Just the thing that’s next to you – right now. Don’t think of the entire house, or the mountain of work that must be done. Who says that decluttering is a all-or-nothing process? Just focus on what’s in front of you.

And get going.

Once you do, you’ll wonder why you haven’t started a long time ago!

Keep it small so you can finish the task in one short sitting. Don’t stop until it’s done.

See my coffee mug drawer above? It took less than 30 mins, and I got rid of a huge pile of unused (though totally adorable) tea cups and dainty little things – that I’ve been holding onto forever.

One drawer DONE!

Do you have any idea the kick I get EVERY MORNING when I open this drawer?

I actually don’t even need coffee anymore – I just open the drawer! :))

 

PRO TIP: Don’t start with the room that is most overwhelming, or very emotional. Start with an area that can be done quickly, this will inspire you to keep going. Areas in the living room, entry room, bathroom are great for a start.

Deal with piles of PAPER CLUTTER last. Once your declutter muscle is stronger, you’ll be better equipped to deal with piles of paper much more effectively.

 

2.

FIRST STEP – A BOX

Starting is the most difficult part.

Keep it simple.

1. Grab a box, mark it DONATIONS

2. Remove the contents of one small area, section, or shelf.

Taking things out of their familiar setting helps you to look at it with fresh eyes.

BUT…don’t dump your entire closet on the bed – it will become overwhelming and then you have a bigger mess. One little section at a time.

3. Now do a quick scan for easy and obvious things to donate.

Just go with your instinct.

The goal is to find OBVIOUS things you don’t use anymore, are broken or not working well. Put it in the box.

This step shouldn’t be hard, a simple scan-and-pick. It helps loosen the muscles – like before a run.

4. Now you can start picking up one item after another and ask yourself: Do I like it, use it often, does it fit my current lifestyle? Only return the items to your cupboard that have a clear YES.

As you go, you may also find things that are broken, or non-functional, or just plain yucky. Get those out too. In the trash.

At this point we just want to make quick, easy decisions. Is this worthy of taking up valuable real estate, or is it time for a new life elsewhere?

Go fast, and move quickly. We’re just doing YES or NO.

If you find you’re having a hard time to decide on an item, put it in a maybe pile and move on. Don’t break your momentum.

 

PRO TIP: It’s not worth it to spend a lot of time on items you’re not sure about. You can mark your “Maybe” bin with a date 6 months from now, and take it to the basement /garage. Here’s something interesting that often happens. Some of those items will come to haunt you later on, and you’ll know to let them go.

OR, you’ll forget all about it and never think of a single item again.

And you’ll know to let it go. 🙂

 

(source)

3.

COME BACK TO YOUR VISION

You will get tired, and may feel overwhelmed. Somewhere along the way I’m sure you’ll get distracted, and that’s OK. But without an idea of where you want to end up, you may find yourself drifting off to nowhere.

Before you start, ask yourself a few simple questions.

1. What you want from this room, how you want to use it, and how you want to feel here.

2. What do you imagine for yourself? Think about where you are right now in your life. What are you most proud of, and what are the most important things in your life? How do you want to spend your time and energy.

Stand back and look with a fresh eye at the space. Is the stuff in this room helping you move closer to that goal?

Share these thoughts with someone, or write them down for yourself.

Now take a picture of the space before you start. I know this sounds silly, but this is very important for two reasons.

– I guarantee you will be so surprised and delighted a short while from now, to see where you were when you started

– it will motivate you to keep going

(source)

4.

ASK A FRIEND + KEEP IT LIGHT

Most things are better shared, right?

Going through your things will reveal some interesting things that symbolizes special moments, bring great memories, and even things you forgot you had.

This is a wonderful opportunity to connect with a family member or friend, and besides, you’ll appreciate an extra hand, a little encouragement, and emotional support. Put on the music, have a glass of something. Keep it light.

Make a point of sharing the stories, and remember to sometimes find the humor and laugh at yourself.

 

Also, acknowledge that there will be moments where you may feel emotional, sad, overwhelmed, guilty, or like a failure. It’s not always easy to go through a lifetime of belongings.

Give yourself time.

And tell also the stories of the sentimental items. If you’re totally not ready to let go of the heavy stuff, leave it for now and focus on something lighter. That’s fine.

(source)

5.

DON’T AIM FOR PERFECT

This is so important. We all swoon over the the picture perfect images on Pinterest.

And we want THAT!

It’s very possible, as long as you keep in mind:

– it’s a process and takes time to get there. It’s fantastic to have that inspiration, however, there’s no quick or magic solution. Just keep working at it.

– most of those images are staged.

Right now we’re aiming for improvement, not perfection.

When you get a little despondent, ask:

Is it better than before?  Yes, that’s all. We’re making progress!

 

(source)

Listen to this, friend, I was in my 50’s when I started decluttering!

Wish I had started years ago.

I’m so mad. So much wasted time, money, and worries for nothing.

 

“Reducing the number of things we own, increases the satisfaction we get”

–Fumio Sasaki, Goodbye Things

 

Decluttering is the first step in design.

“when you have fewer things, you have more clarity to develop your true uniqueness”

Also from that guy.

” I would say that if the idea of decluttering pushes some kind of a button in of you, it may be a sign to give it a try”

 

Go declutter something right now.

Find your true uniqueness.

Take the first step.

 

I’ I’ll be cheering you on.

Mia

 

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